The Open Letter to Kim K
Yeah, once in a while I write posts like these, the kind that disappoint my parents and my kids alike. But, who else will stick it up to Kim and her klan? Uggh, so I will do the needful.
This one is going to be special. I’ll tell you how she motivates me to do better. And whenever I feel vain, I just have to think of her to instantly feel morally superior. One of the great things I’ve learned from her is how to stay in the spotlight and what to imitate. Look at her absolute dedication to the craft, from vocal fry 10 years ago to now AI filters in 2026.
Hi Kim,
I know you. I know of you. Just making that clear so you do not start wondering if we met at the Met Gala after-party or while I was calling your customer service line to complain about a pair of SKIMS I bought.
I just wanted to drop you this little open letter because, honestly, who else is going to tell you the truth wrapped in sarcasm and zero chill? Not your army of yes-people, that is for sure. From a closet organizer for Paris Hilton to now, you have come a long way. I will not even get into the video that propelled you into stardom. Congrats on continuing to prove your relevance, even in 2026, like it is no big deal. Truly inspirational.
The Business of “Being”
I actually wanted to write “stop parading yourself around,” because you’re teaching impressionable young girls and children that being seen is equal to being valuable. And for vulnerable adolescents who are still forming their personal identities, women like you are making them anxious about their bodies and afraid of being ordinary.
But then I thought, I should learn from you as a billionaire businesswoman. First off, Skims settling that $200,000 civil penalty under New Jersey’s Consumer Fraud Act for improperly collecting sales tax on tax-exempt clothing? Bold move. Nothing says “body-positive shapewear for everyone” like quietly paying the state because you allegedly charged extra tax on items that should not have been taxed for five straight years. Did the receipt say “empowerment tax,” or was that just implied?
Along with that, I wanted to list all the things that make me think about hiring you as my personal brand manager. If someone out there isn’t feeling good enough about themselves, you’ve a product for that. So I won’t harp on the fact that sensitive teens might internalize comparisons and become addicted to body surveillance and perfectionism.
The body has to be curvier, the content has to be curated, and the narrative has to be controlled. Your personal life is content. Milk it until you drop dead. Right?
The Cost of Fame
Maybe I have to learn how not to be “embarrassingly obsessed” with fame and Instagram likes. How many times do you refresh your posts to check the number of likes? What a way it must be to live your life.
Look, I get it. Life’s tough when your biggest problem is deciding how to design thongs with faux bushes. Or when you use face veils as a fashion statement to hide those botched Botox jobs. And when people are literally dying, you still can’t stop obsessing over the diamond earrings you lost in the pool.
The Anti-Role Model
So here’s my blunt advice. Take a hike. Stop scamming your way into the headlines with your money and resources. Or don’t. Clearly, it’s working. Just know that for most of us, you’re a laughing stock.
But seriously, you’ve motivated me to embrace my flaws without buying a fix. Speaking of which, I’m “hiring” you as my anti-role model. I imagine you as a trial lawyer in court. Instead of presenting the evidence, you will go, “Your Honor, go to TikTok. See for yourself.” Sheesh.
In summary, Kim, you motivate me to live better by being the ultimate “what not to do” manual. Less vanity, more substance. Less curated perfection, more authentic mess. Now pay me, because I need a wellness break just for writing this. Your life is exhausting even from afar.
But, hey, you’ve got me striving to be the opposite of Kardashian-level iconic.
The Kardashian Life In Memes
Brady and Kardashian Fans On Comments Sections
When their dating rumors made the rounds, sadly this is what people were defending.

– 0 –
About The Article Author:
Hi, I’m Rachana. Its been my dream for years to do something to consciously create a better future where every one of us is excited about our own potential. My challenge to everyone is that they aspire for their personal best and leave a legacy of their work through their contributions to mankind.
One more thing. In December of 2044, I hope to win the Nobel.
Will you join me on this journey of growth and transformation?
Namasté.
Subscribe to My ONLY Bans: Exposing Celebrity Crimes 
I’ll keep on eye on them so you don’t have to.
AI Slop, Brainrot & Shitposting: Who’s Moderating the Internet Anymore? – Part I
What Is Brain Rot, Anyway? If you want to learn more about brain rot, you're at the right place. If you don't know what it is, even then, you're at the right place. When I visited Rome a few years ago, I realized Italians had given the world fabulous looking...
It Took a Publishing Scandal to Expose a Broken Industry and the Rise of AI Slop Books
Mia Ballard, a woman living in the UK, had self published a book called Shy girl in February 2025. The book is about a desperate young woman who meets a guy online and is now being held hostage as his pet. It became successful until readers started to question if it...
The Radical Acceptance of a Book Deal: Lindy West’s New Modern Love
I’m not entirely sure where our society is headed, but I've understood one thing for sure. If your marriage implodes in a strange way, there’s probably a book deal waiting for you on the other side. Lindy West had written a book called Shrill. I had fun listening...
Human Slop: How This Fellowship-Winning ‘Satire’ Shows the Literature World’s Low Bar
Hey, sorry this needs a content warning. I'm about to review an unpalatable vulgar fictional story by a writer who has won a $75k/yr fellowship prize for this gem. A full 2-year creative writing fellowship at Stanford, nonetheless. The opening paragraph reads like...
When Men’s Vanity Becomes a Requirement: How Social Media Turned Self-Improvement Into Obsession
A decade ago, I had a Korean coworker who put my skincare regimen to shame. I used to be annoyed at him for not leaving a single lick of hair on his perfectly groomed, smooth skin. He blamed it on his culture’s beauty standards — and the fact that his wife was a...
In Life, He Left Our Hearts Racing — In Death, He Broke Them
Back around 2005, my husband and I were still watching TV together in the evenings. One of the shows we’d tune into was Grey's Anatomy. Yes, we had claimed our solidarity and remained fully committed to each other in spirit, but there seemed to be an unspoken rule...
Chopra Is a Construct. Epstein’s Crimes Are Real.
The Business of Consciousness Constructs In one of the emails to Epstein, Deepak Chopra declares, “God is a Construct. Cute Girls are Real.” Yup, the self help Guru Deepak Chopra features in Epstein emails over 3000 times. And this is just one of the few...
Empowerment or Desperation? Why Are Aging Pop Stars Still Chasing Clout Like Teen Influencers?
Hey, look, I’m by no means a prude. I’ve made two babies, for crying out loud. But day after day, seeing talented artists, musicians, and celebrities parading their half ass bodies on the internet is driving me up the wall. I’ve jammed to Jennifer Lopez’s songs in...
Be Happy in the New Year: The Meme Moments of 2025 That Made Us Laugh, Cope, and Carry On
I'm telling you something I've not said out loud before, especially in front of my Gen Z children. Gen Z is the absolute GOAT when it comes to hilarious memes and comment trolls on the internet. For example, here's their take on a Instagram influencers, many of them...
Apparently My Foul Mouth Means I’m a Saint. And I’ve Got The F*ing Proof.
- Science Redeems My Four Letter Words In 2017, when I decided to quit my corporate job and become a teacher, my friends immediately staged an intervention. Are you sure, are you having a midlife crisis, how will you manage all this? More interestingly, some of...
🚨 Subscribe To My OnlyBans: Cancel Culture Is Too Slow, So I’m Starting a Blog (No Payment Required)
- Subscribe to My ONLY Bans: Exposing Celebrity Crimes 🚨 I’ll keep on eye on them so you don’t have to. Hey, what's up? Since most girls on the planet seem to either aspire for one or already have an Only Fans account (if you don't know what that is, don't use...
News for the Unemployed: Kris Jenner Got Plastic Surgery and Now Looks Like Kim’s Twin. LMAO.
- In a classic “I don’t know what I was thinking” moment, I once wrote a crash course on the Kardashians. And even wondered what Nicki Minaj was referring to when she was talking about the Anaconda in her song. By that time I already had two kids, but you know,...











