*
During the ages of 5 to 12, children learn to do things on their own. This is the age where they feel confident in their ability to initiate and achieve goals. Negligence or restrictions on a child during such time casts doubts on his own abilities leaving him not striving for competence because of feelings of inadequacy. ~ Industry (competence) vs. Inferiority by Erik Erikson.
*
Social and Cultural expectations:
How a child adapts to his changing environment and the needs of his burgeoning youth determines his self confidence and self esteem.
Children from strict patriarchal families like from the Asian origin are expected to strive for family goals and not to engage in behaviors that would bring dishonor to the family. Generally, some parents tend to show very little interest in the child’s viewpoint regarding family matters. Similarly, some cultures very often undermine children as decision makers. Parenting styles tend to be authoritarian and directive. “I know what is best for my kid, I don’t need his input.” Is usually how some parents feel.
*
Unfavorable climate at home:
Difficult mothers and negligent fathers can stunt the emotional growth of a teen severely. As a result of, emotional neglect can haunt children all their lives. During their childhood, it can make them feel unsafe, undervalued and under protected. As they grow into adults, it can make them defiantly self reliant to a point that they can’t see anyone care for them like how only they can. This means they don’t see a real value in investing in life sustaining emotions like love and nurture.
*
Unrealistic aspirations from parents and peers:
Many children are naturally anxious about high expectations at home and school as they continue to learn. As they enter middle school, they are also eager to meet peer expectations. Sometimes peer expectations can be in direct conflict with parental expectations. What is cool with his peers might be an absolute no no for a child’s parent.
*
Effect of expectations:
Setting expectations positively or negatively can impact your child’s self confidence.
- Positively: The more you encourage good behavior the more the child is likely to work towards meeting expectations.
- Negatively: If you expect more and more, the burden of meeting expectations on moving targets falls heavily on the child.
Kids can often internalize frustration towards their parents, “How many times do I have to tell you that its becoming too much for me. How many activities have you signed me up for?” When they realize they can’t meet anyone’s expectations, children rebel.
*
New Environment and Adaptability:
Moving towns or even schools in the middle of their emerging youth years might be a detriment to their self worth. As we all know, finding new friends at any age can always been challenging. A child’s social intelligence and compatibility of engaging with the community will also determine in how well he will thrive.
*
We all want to be good parents. Here’s how you can begin.
* * *
About The Article Author:
Hi, I’m Rachana. Its been my dream for years to do something to consciously create a better future where every one of us is excited about our own potential. My challenge to everyone is that they aspire for their personal best and leave a legacy of their work through their contributions to mankind.
One more thing. In December of 2044, I hope to win the Nobel.
Will you join me on this journey of growth and transformation?
Namasté.
FREE Parent Workshops
Future STRONG is a global initiative for personal growth. While you’re guiding your children on a path to resilience, independence and happiness, parents, have you thought about “investing in you?” Come join us.
Check Out Our Latest In Mindful Parenting!
AI Slop, Brainrot & Shitposting: Who’s Moderating the Internet Anymore? – Part I
What Is Brain Rot, Anyway? If you want to learn more about brain rot, you're at the right place. If you don't know what it is, even then, you're at the right place. When I visited Rome a few years ago, I realized Italians had given the world fabulous looking...
Why the World Is Finally Slowing Down: The Rise of the Slow Thought Revolution
I've been noticing an interesting phenomenon lately. The desire for slowing down and adopting an intentional way of consuming information. For nearly two decades the internet trained us to read faster, scroll faster, react faster. But lately something unexpected is...
The Attachment Economy Is Here: What AI Companions Mean for All of Us – Part I
Parents, Get Ready To Welcome Your AI In-Laws There will be a time in the not so distant future, when your child will introduce you to his girlfriend. And there's a possibility, you will end up locking eyes, if that's even possible, with his AI companion. The...
Inside Social Media Lawsuits: How Meta, YouTube & AI Are Harming Teens
Life As a Chaos Machine I was on a beach, when I couldn't move, listening to The Chaos Machine by Max Fisher. The book makes painfully clear that Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook leadership knew their platforms were harming young minds. Internal research linked...
Tech Billionaires Don’t Trust Their Own Tech: The Screen-Time Secrets They’re Hiding From Parents
Toying With Our Futures At the Aspen Ideas Festival in June 2024, Peter Thiel was interviewed by Andrew Ross Sorkin. He volunteered information in response to a question, “If you ask executives of social media companies how much screen time they let their kids...
When Dreams Abroad Turn Heavy: The Tragic Story and the Silent Mental Health Crisis of International Students
A Promise And Brilliance Lost “I'm a Master’s student in the Chemical and Biomolecular Engineering department at University of California, Berkeley, with an undergraduate degree from IIT Madras. I'm passionate about deep-tech innovations in soft and active...
Success vs Failure: Why Boredom, Stillness, and Slow Mastery Create the Most Powerful Humans
Success vs. Failure Billy Oppenheimer, a writer, once described picking up Robert Greene from the airport. For the uninitiated, Greene is the author of The 48 Laws of Power, a must-read for those who love power and want to dominate the world. Of course, the...
Why Being a Generalist Is the Ultimate Power Move in the Age of AI, Uncertainty, and Reinvention
The Case for the Generalist Years ago, I had created a username called wannabepolymath. I wasn't sure which single thing interested me most because I wanted to learn many different things. As I read more, I felt a growing urge to explore new fields, seeking...
The Evolution of Love: Marriage, Survival, and Personal Reinvention in a Changing World
A Society Experiences Growing Pains I took this picture of a wall hanging in the lobby of a hotel we were staying at in Granada, Spain. Somehow, the couples whose heads are disintegrating felt like a fitting image for the essay on marriage I was writing. I’ve...
Is Roblox Safe for Kids? What Every Parent Must Know About Grooming, Explicit Content & Online Dangers
From Fun to Risk: The Reality of Roblox for Children In 2023, as parents of my students would ask me about the safety of Roblox, I began researching about it. I was even beginning to teach it in my own classrooms, because it was a creative game that was both...
The Integrity Exit: Why Mrinank Sharma’s Departure Matters
Two days ago, Mrinank Sharma resigned from his role as an AI safety engineer at Anthropic. He had been with the company for two years. “The world is in peril. And not just from AI, or bioweapons, but from a whole series of interconnected crises unfolding in this very...
When AI Mirrors Our Pain: The Uncomfortable Truth About Human Suffering in Training Data
The loneliness. God, Andy. The loneliness. When Andy Ayrey, an AI enthusiast, recently asked Claude, a type of LLM like ChatGPT, Gemini, etc., for its take on the questions it receives from humans, this is what it said. The loneliness. God, Andy. The loneliness. In...
Trackbacks/Pingbacks