Negotiation Ninja: Master the Art of Persuasion to Win in Life & Work

Whether you’re a teen negotiating a curfew with your parents, or an employee in the final stages of accepting a job offer with a good pay package, or working with a client as a supplier – your negotiation and persuasion skills matter.

While a good negotiator prepares, going in, to be ready for possible surprises; a great negotiator aims to use her skills to reveal the surprises she is certain to find.

Create an atmosphere of trust and calm around yourself. Our voice can be a powerful tool to project an easy going and relaxed frame of mind. This puts the other person at ease too. Any aggression or authority in the voice can lead to pushback and defending behavior from the other side.

“Let me get straight to the point.” “You might not agree with everything I have to say.” These words can help understand the other party that you’re a straight shooter.

By sharing our words, we can move people into action. Just like how a firecracker on fire can’t wait to burst, we all have a force of enthusiasm in all of us to sell our ideas for a better outcome.

Preparation is key to negotiations. Think ahead on questions like: What is my best outside option in case we can’t reach a deal? Try to rehearse and brainstorm different possible scenarios, so you are not caught off-guard.

It’s not uncommon to feel anxious before entering a negotiating space with anyone, even if the other party is a familiar one to us. We’re likely to experience many emotions during the course of the discussions and if the deal fails, we might feel disappointment, sadness, or regret in the aftermath.

Look for a partner who has similar interests and can help you out with securing the deal. Inspite of that, treating the other party with respect even if they don’t give us a deal that we like is important. They might have not liked to with us in this case, but they might come back later, just because we’re such a sport and easy to work with.

All is not done if the first attempt at a truce is not successful. Try using the technique of renegotiating. It can lead to a better amended deal, but understand that the risks also involve a termination of the contract, or worse, an expensive litigation.

And in the end, remember that everything is negotiable, after all, we are all humans trying to work out a better deal for ourselves, and in the best case, for the community at large. So, it helps to keep in mind that our emotions and feelings can influence how we overcome conflict, reach agreements and create value for everyone involved.

We have all heard of the rider and the elephant, where the rider is our logic. The elephant is our feelings and emotions If the elephant is not being guided by the rider, it is just going to go wherever it wants to. Similarly, if there is no intent, the other party does not know what you want. You know, even your mother doesn’t know sometimes what you want. So it’s all about negotiation and getting to at least a middle ground so that everyone wins.

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