NOTE ON THE AUTHOR: Believe it or not, this little golden nugget of wisdom about the art of growing up comes from 15-year-old Sriansh Indaram, who lives in the United States. Sometimes, the people who remind us of what growing up really means are the ones who are right in the middle of it.

Thank you for reading!

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I was doomscrolling on Instagram when I came across a framework that asked a pretty interesting question: What actually turns a child into a successful adult? That isn’t too unusual for my feed since I watch a lot of educational videos, but this infographic immediately caught my attention. It was put together by researchers at the University of Chicago as part of the Wallace Foundation’s Foundations for Young Adult Success framework. And after spending a few minutes reading it, I realized it was talking about something I had never really thought about before.

I expected to see the average claims like “get good grades” or “be the leader in situations”, but this was totally different. The researchers contended that kids don’t become capable adults through just one defining moment. There are many small steps and mindset changes that turn them into who they want to be. These are often described as ordinary tasks; like trying new things, reflecting over experiences, and just being in your thoughts. Doing this at home, at school, with your friends (anywhere). Over and over again. This is apparently what drives the real engine of growth! 

I found this very strangely freeing. This means that I don’t have to look for a specific sign or engineer some perfect experience to feel that I am growing. I just need to experience different opportunities and give myself time to reflect on them afterwards. 

What this loop specifically mentioned were the terms: Self-Regulation, Knowledge, Mindsets, and Values. I have never heard of these terms used in a context like this. I know that each of these would “bring you up as a successful adult”, but the way that they were connected in this cycle brought something new to the table.

A few days after reading about the framework, I went to the FIFA Fan Festival in Atlanta, Georgia. It was unlike anything I had ever experienced before.

I saw thousands of soccer fans from different countries celebrating together, explored the festival, and experienced a sports culture that I had only seen online before. Just being there expanded my knowledge. Instead of worrying about taking the perfect pictures or planning every minute, I tried to stay present and enjoy what was happening around me. Looking back, that was probably self-regulation without even realizing it.

Then, on the train ride home, I started thinking about everything I had seen. The city felt different somehow. I wasn’t just looking at Atlanta; I felt like I had become part of it for a day. That experience shifted my mindset. Along with this, it strengthened some of my own values, like appreciating different cultures and remembering to actually live in the moment instead of watching life through a screen.

If you had not noticed, I used the terms that I mentioned in the earlier paragraph in my story. What else you might have noticed is that none of these terms show up on a report card. 

They stack up over years, and they quietly become the foundation for everything else. Now you might be like, well sure they are the foundation for everything else, but what do these terms actually do for your life? Three things, according to the framework: agency – the ability to make real choices about your life, competence – the ability to handle whatever situation you get put into, and identity – knowing who you are. These three things will help you succeed and grow as an individual. 

Now, I don’t really have a tidy conclusion here, other than the following: if you are a parent, teacher, coach, or anyone that has meaning in a kid’s life, you are probably already doing more than you think. An example would be letting your kid/student have an experience, then asking them “how’d it go?” – then actually listen to their answer. 

This isn’t done with grand gestures, but instead through the small, repeated acts. Because, growing up isn’t one big moment. It’s a thousand small ones. 

That’s it for me, the rest is up to you!

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Young Adult Success Framework by Wallace Foundation

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